Fitzy Lays 9

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The three biggest favorites of week 5 are all laying 9 point wood and all of us wood layas should be laying the 9 point wood with all three. 

There's no reason to complicate the first one I'm going to give you. The Patriots...coming off a bye...aka they've had extra time to prepare...for Brandon Weeden. 

I can't wait for TB12, Gronk and Neon Deion to go up and down the field at will against that scum of the earth Greg Hardy and the rest of the Cowboy defense. 

Patriots (-9) 37 - COWBOYS 13
Beasley Catches the one TD for the Boyz. 

The second seems a little tougher on the surface. The St. Louis Rams have played some decent ball. They set the world on fire when they upset the Hawks in week 1 so right away we all thought they had the ability to compete against Super Bowl contending teams. They dropped two straight after that and just when we we're about to dismiss them Todd Gurley finally arrives to help them top a strong Cardinal team on the road. 

The bad news for you St. Louis is that those guys you beat ain't Aaron Rodgers bro. Aaron Rodgers is the best player in the world right now. Give me Mr. Munn at Lambeau laying a trillion. 

PACKERS (-9) 31 - Rams 10

You have to really trust Fitzy to lay the wood with me for the last one. We go from the two best quarterback's in the league to the best game manager in the league as we play the Chiefs at Arrowhead as they host Jay Cutler and the Bad News Bears. 

The Bears are coming off their first win of the year but don't let that fool you. Foxy and the boys are still a disaster. Guys are getting traded, guys are getting hurt and the guys who aren't traded or hurt just aren't that good. 

The Chiefs are also coming off their first win of the year but the difference is that they are actually pretty good. After a season opening win, Coach Reid's Chiefs have dropped three straight against three of the league's best. They're are more than due to get the train back on the tracks this week and they'll cover this 9 point number in doing so.

CHIEFS (-9) 22 - Bears 7

-Fitzgerald

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p.s. Since their men were mentioned....

FantasyFitz's Week 5 Minaj A Trois

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Viagra Play of the Week - Antonio Brown $8,700 (Steelers WR)  

(This guy is guaranteed to erect your point total)

Antonio Brown is too good for us to tamper our expectations for him sans Big Ben. The numbers last week look sketchier than the performance. Brown was close to hauling in a touchdown which would have put him in the double digit point range, which is also known as consistent Antonio point range. Trust that Fitzy's bargain basement DraftKings QB helps our boy get back into the end zone this week for not 1, but 2 scores. Antonio is still Antonio. Find a way to spend the $8,700 when the rest of the world won't have the stones too. 

BBW - Ameer Abdullah $4,100 (Lions RB)

(Blue Balls Warning - This guy will leave you painfully unsatisfied and wanting more)

Stop trying to make Ameer Abdullah happen. The rookie's a nice playa but he's not ready to be the playa he can be on this bad Lions team. The Cards are also stingy against backs trying to catch it out of the backfield so he's not even intriguing in this weird PPR DraftKings world. Play Matt Jones or CJ Spiller instead and save yourself a couple of bucks. 

Moped Ride of the Week - Antonio Gates $4,200 (Chargers TE)

(This guy will be fun to ride for the week but you're not going to want to brag to your friends about doing it)

Antonio Gates makes his return from suspension for Monday Night Fitz at home against the Steelers. Instead of spending his time off making rap videos that confirm that he's the biggest scum in the world, Gates spent his time off getting ready to make an impact for his team. Daddy of the year/Quarterback Phil Rivers has talked about how jacked up he is to have Antonio back this week. With Stevie Johnson already ruled out there are plenty of targets available in this offense, and since the opposing Steelers' defense is fairly underwhelming when it comes to defending the TE position, look for this Antonio to also look like Antonio. 

Pos	Player	FPPG
QB	Mike Vick	4.4	swap out
RB	Dion Lewis	19.5	swap out
RB	T.J. Yeldon	10.8	swap out
WR	Cole Beasley	8.6	swap out
WR	O. Beckham Jr.	17.4	swap out
WR	Antonio Brown	26.2	swap out
TE	Antonio Gates	0.0	swap out
FLEX	Rob Gronkowski	25.6	swap out
DST	Falcons	8.3	swap out

-FantasyFitz 

Monday Night Fitz is Back to Lay the Wood With the Hawks

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The only two NFC Playoff teams from last season sporting losing records for this current season  meet tonight on Monday Night Fitz to wrap up the Week 4 action. 

It's amazing what one win can do. Heading into last weeks games, both squads we're winless. Russell, a returning Killa Kam and the Hawks silenced the criticism with a win (and cover!) against the Bears. Matty, Mega and the Lions failed to register a tally in the win column and that forced the winless criticism to grow into everyone's favorite burn the QB's jersey criticism. 

KBStafford89 took to instagram and showed a little something this Lions team has been lacking, defense. With DeAndre Levy still out tonight, the Lions defense doesn't seem prepared to find a solution for their recent struggles. Even with Beast Mode out, the Hawks offense contains enough fire power to put enough points on the board to allow their LOB led defense to do the heavy lifting to cover this 10 point wood. 

#GoHawks

SEAHAWKS (-10) 31 – Lions 13

-Fitzgerald

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No Points In The Forecast In San Diego

Photo Credit-Patrick E. McCarthy(Newsday) /Filter-NYMWS

I'm pretty sure the last time these San Diegoans saw this much rain was back in 1904 when the city was discovered by the Germans.  The weather is out of the ordinary for So Cal this time of the year and it will certainly be a factor in todays barn burner between the Chargers and Browns.  The whales vagina will get wet today and it will be gusty.  Both of those factors will not be favorable for a lot of points today. 

The Chargers have been hard pressed to find any consistent offense thus far in 2015 and the Browns are, well, the Browns.  Both are struggling all around to be honest.  Rivers hasn't been able to get it done except when he looks for Danny Woodhead and Keenan Allen.  I never know who's starting under center for the Browns, so that's never good.  The injuries on both teams are monumental.  Basically both teams defenses aren't that great either.

These facts translate to a low score.  It's as simple as that, and if you don't see it that way then let's just agree to disagree.

Chargers-21 Browns-16 UNDA 44.5

PS
I think that Ron Burgundy would do a better job at running the Browns than this brutal front office that doesn't seem to know how to ever get their heads out of their asses.  Terrible job by them year after year.

-Clay

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Clay's Week 4 Fantasy Minaj

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Viagra Play of the Week - Amari Cooper (Raiders WR-Draft Kings $6,300)  

(This guy is guaranteed to erect your point total)

Can I talk any more about my man crush for Amari Cooper anymore than I already do?  Yes, yes, I think I can.  The dude is a stud and is a must start every week, but I think this week will be his true coming out party.  Receptions and yards have increased over Cooper's first 3 games and you should expect that trend to continue today against the pathetic Bears.  Carr will look for Cooper all day and he will come through for his QB.  Look for 10+ catches with over 150 yards and 2 TDs.  

BBW - DeAndre Hopkins (Texans WR-Draft Kings $7,300)

(Blue Balls Warning - This guy will leave you painfully unsatisfied and wanting more)

The Texans stink.  Well, not really but Ryan Mallett really stinks and this guy is really holding this team back.  I now understand that Arian Foster will be a go today for the Texans, so I can see the running game getting most of the offensive time in Atlanta.  The Texans are going to want to make sure that they keep the Falcons explosive weapons off of the field and drain the clock as much as possible.  The Falcons defense especially against the pass has impressed e and I think they'll bottle up Hopkins just like the Panthers did in week 2.  Look for about 4 catches for 55 yards, so if you have better options don't be afraid to have DeAndre ride the pine.

Moped Ride of the Week - Ted Ginn Jr. (Panthers WR-Draft Kings $3,400)

(This guy will be fun to ride for the week but you're not going to want to brag to your friends about doing it)

Who else is Killa Cam going to throw it to?  He clearly has no confidence in this Funchess guy, as Ginn has double the amount of targets (that one's for Fitzy) and the former Jet great, Jericho Cotchery is hurt.  Ginn has actually looked pretty good this season.  You can tell that he's been putting in extra work with Cam and he's been rewarded on the field.  Another key to Ginn's game is the returning prowess that he's possessed ever since his college days at Ohio State.  If Ginn gets loose on a kickoff that'll just be icing on the case of a game that should see him total about 100 yards while finding the end zone once.


Clay's Week 4 Draft King's Lineup:

Pos	Player	FPPG
QB	Aaron Rodgers	27.7	swap out
RB	Jamaal Charles	25.4	swap out
RB	Carlos Hyde	17.5	swap out
WR	Amari Cooper	20.0	swap out
WR	Ted Ginn Jr.	11.6	swap out
WR	James Jones	20.3	swap out
TE	Jason Witten P	17.0	swap out
FLEX	Mark Ingram	18.3	swap out
DST	Panthers	10.0	swap out